Fellow readers, you'll want to jump on this. Groupon has a great deal for a $20 Barnes and Noble gift card for only $10! Holla!

If you don't have an account yet, sign up for one. The deal is listed under Chicago but it's for everyone. The fine print:

• Expires Apr 10, 2011
• Limit 1/person. Limit 1/trans. Valid in-store or online. Valid on sale items. Groupon value reduces by $10 on 4/11, except where prohibited.

The deal will be up on the site through Monday but could sell out before then. Happy reading!

*Yes, these are affiliate links

My Ode to Coffee {Smart and Final Ambience Giveaway}

This sponsored post and giveaway are inspired by my sampling of the new Ambiance line of coffee by Smart and Final. *Contest is now Closed - Congrats to #27, Kalea!*

"Over second and third cups flow matters of high finance, high state, common gossip and low comedy. Coffee is a social binder, a warmer of tongues, a soberer of minds, a stimulant of wit, a foiler of sleep if you want it so. From roadside mugs to the classic demi-tasse, it is the perfect democrat."            ~Author Unknown

I'm sure you're all dying to know how I feel about coffee. You could skip straight to the bottom for the gift card giveaway, but you'd be missing out on a chance to get to know me better!

I didn't start drinking coffee until I was in college. I've always liked the smell of the beans and a fresh brewed pot, but before I went away to school I couldn't take the taste. Even when I started drinking it, it wasn't really because I wanted a cup of coffee. It started, like most people I knew, as a tool for cram sessions or a way to wake up after a long night of partying, er, studying.

© 2013 Asher Isbrucker, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio

Before I learned to appreciate the taste and recognize a bad cup of coffee, I drank mine like Clarence, a character in one of the best movies ever made.* "It's not a good cup of coffee unless the spoon stands up." The sugar-to-liquid ratio was totally skewed toward sugar. My teeth feel gritty just thinking about it.

I've become a bit of a coffee snob in my old age. We prefer to grind our own beans, only drink flavored coffee and always have an assortment of creamers and half and half in the fridge. Also? I don't mix flavors. If my coffee flavor is creme brulee, the creamer has to be, too. French Vanilla and Hazelnut do not go together and never shall the two mix in my mug.

Speaking of mugs, I have two favorites. There's my everyday mug that I went to several Starbucks to find, and my Copco travel mug. I don't let anyone use them so don't even ask.

© 2011 LenDog64, Flickr | CC-BY-ND | via Wylio

Does anyone remember that TV show from the early '90's Grace Under Fire? In one episode, Grace's neighbor, Nadine, got into a fight with her husband Wade over how she takes her coffee. "Doesn't he know I like my coffee taupe?!" That's me. I can't drink my coffee unless it's a certain shade of taupe.

I also have pretty specific tastes when I go out for coffee. Most people stop offering to go on a coffee run when I'm around because I will hand you my drink order on a Post It note. Yes, I am that person.

I may have gotten a late start, but now coffee is a big part of my life. I usually start my day with it. I've had meetings over a cup. I've made new friends, reconnected with old friends, caught up on life, laughed, had serious discussions and read great books with a cup of coffee nearby.

I love my coffee. I need my coffee. I crave coffee. I have driven out of my way for coffee. Coffee!!!!!!

Ahem.

I've told you my coffee quirks, now you tell me yours. I have a pretty cool prize up for grabs. Smart and Final wants you to get addicted to enjoy their new Ambiance coffee. 

You'll get the same gift basket I was given with a sampling of their 6 flavors AND a $150 gift card. $150 goes a long way at Smart and Final (more on that later). So how do you win? Easy:

Prize: One winner will receive an Ambiance coffee product gift basket and $150 Smart & Final gift card.

Rules/ways to enter:

1. Comment here with your favorite coffee moment, quirk or your beverage of choice.

2. You can earn extra entries for tweeting about this giveaway and using the #MyAmbianceMoment hashtag. Leave a comment with a link to your daily tweet (one tweet/extra entry per day).

3. Post the contest on Facebook and leave a link.

4. You don't have to follow me, friend me or Smart and Final to win. There are 14 other bloggers doing the same giveaway and all links are being Tweeted and posted on the Smart and Final Facebook page.

Sample text: "Enter to win an Ambiance Coffee gift pack and $150 gift card from @smartfinal http://bit.ly/SFSmartiesAmbience #MyAmbianceMoment Pls RT!"

5. You know the drill, no contact info, no entry.

6. I'll post the winner here and on Twitter after I've used Random.org.

7. Winner has 24 hours to respond or I'll choose another.

Deadline: Tuesday February 8th, midnight PST.

Good luck!

*If you can tell me what movie that line is from you'll be my new BFF.

My Kid Told a Racist Joke: Advice Needed

I'm so upset right now I don't know what to do. Tyler got in the car after school saying he had a joke to tell me.

"An American, a Canadian and a Mexican get on a plane."

As soon as he got the words out I bristled. I knew where he was going and I wasn't happy. I'd not heard the joke before but there's no way a joke that starts out like that is going to be good.

He finished as we pulled into the driveway. I put the car in park and, I'll admit, I lit into him a bit. I kept my voice calm but he could tell I was very angry. I told him jokes like that are not OK, not appropriate and he's never to repeat it.

I asked him to substitute a white person, black person and an Asian in the joke. Was it still funny? Did he still think it was OK to repeat?

I asked him if he'd heard the words racist or racism. He hadn't so I explained their definitions. I talked about Columbus, slavery and immigration. I didn't get too deep into those issues since he's only 8, but the examples I used from TV we've watched were things he could relate to and understand.

I told him what I was most angry about, that a joke like that is making its way around the playground. I told him I was angry at the situation, not at him. He told me which friend he heard the joke from. It's a little boy he had a playdate with a few weeks ago. Tyler said the boy heard the joke from someone else. I believe him. I don't think he's devious enough to make that up on the spot to protect his friend.

My dilemma is, should I call this boys mother and tell her what her son is saying? I know that, for the boys, the joke was funny because someone gets punched in the face, not because of its undertones. As kids they just hear the slapstick. But it's something I would want to know about. How do I even begin a conversation like that?

If someone you only met once called you with this information, how would you take it? I want to be clear that I'm not accusing her son of being a racist, merely passing on the information. I don't want to put any strain on the boys' friendship. But, I hate to think of the (blond haired, light eyed) boy telling the joke again around someone some of the older kids and having one of them call him out. I hope I'd be opening the door for Tyler's friend and his parents to have a conversation about acceptance. What if it backfires?

Would you call the other mom? Has another parent ever called you with something like this? Have you ever made a phone call like this? HELP!

Our Hockey Player: Wordless Wednesday

Standing Out in A Crowd

Driving to meet some friends this morning I had a moment that is kind of common (for me anyway) in my suburban part of San Diego. A group of ladies were out for some exercise. I drove past and said to myself, "oh wow, black people!" And what's more, they were faces I haven't seen around town before.

There is one black woman I see quite often in my area between 8-9am. She must walk the same route because I can almost draw an 'X' on the sidewalk where our paths cross. She was not part of the group I saw this morning, which makes it all the more intriguing. Where do they live? How long have they been here that I haven't seen them before? When you're uncommon, it's easy to spot someone else who looks like you.

Since I started going to school I've almost always been the only black face in the class and one of few in the school. It got better in junior high and high school. College was an eye opener. But there are times when being a minority within a minority can be a little lonely.

Make no mistake, I'm not feeling sorry for myself. I'm happy with the decision to move here. It reminds me a lot of where we moved when my family left Chicago. I still love that area and, as a parent, I'm happy I can give Tyler the same type of suburban experience I had growing up. But, I'd be lying if I said I didn't wonder how, if at all, our lives would be different if we lived somewhere else.

I didn't pull over and introduce myself this morning. I would have come off like a lunatic. But, if the women are new to the area, perhaps over time we'll run into each other more and more often and I'll be out walking with them one day, too.

Shoe Shopping: Fashion Haul Friday

I've talked about my shopping trips before but not too often on video. I've resolved to do more vlogging this year. I like to talk and hate to type. I should have started vlogging from the get-go. 

This video is purely self promotional*. I'm so in love with the shoes I bought recently and they were such amazing deals I couldn't help myself. But, I do offer a bit of shopping wisdom too, so maybe it's only 90% self promotion. Happy Friday!




*At least I'm honest, LOL!

2011 Reading List

I'm not always good at updating these lists, but for the most part they're pretty complete. I have lists for 2008, 2009 and 2010.

Holly's Inbox and Holly's Inbox: Scandal in the City - (Holly Denham) Both of these are true chick lit. They are told entirely through the email exchanges between Holly, her friends and family. Every book set in Britain is compared to Bridget Jones in some way and this series is no exception. But I liked them both and they're totally quick reads.

Bloodroot - (Amy Greene) This was great! I don't know where I get my fascination with books set in the South. The characters are great and the setting is perfect.

I wrote more about Denham and Greene's books here.

Brava, Valentine - (Adriana Trigiani) I've said before how much I love her books and this was no exception. Just as good, if not better, than Very Valentine.

The Hunger Games, Catching Fire, Mockingjay - (Suzanne Collins) Holy wow, I loved this series! There are very few books I will race out and buy in hardback but I did for the second two books. I read all three within a week. Now I'm getting caught up in all the movie news too. I can't wait until next year when it comes out! The series is marketed young adult but, like Harry Potter, adults are reading it too. So good!

The Kitchen House Another love. It's hard reading books about slavery and the south but it's enlightening as well. This one definitely had parts that were hard to read, but the story wouldn't ring true if those elements were left out. I heard criticism of The Help because it didn't "go there." The Kitchen House definitely does. This was for book club.

The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks - (Rebecca Skloot) I almost don't know what to say other than I loved it. I can't call it a 'story' because it's all fact. Skloot does an excellent job telling the Lacks family history, what happened to Henrietta and how Henrietta's cancer cells have become one of the most important aspects of modern medicine. It's a fascinating read.

While I'm Falling The Rest of Her Life- (Laura Moriarty) The first book I read by Moriarty was The Center of Everything. I love her writing style. Some of her sentences are so beautiful. I finished Falling and went straight to the library for Life. I rarely read an author back to back unless I'm totally captivated. Both these books are really good.

Star Island - (Carl Hiaasen) I really like his books. His agenda is pretty obvious (conservation, protecting wildlife) but it's such a subplot it's not obnoxious. His books are funny and silly. This one is about an actress who is hired as a stand in for a pop star. There's kidnapping and paparazzi. Hiaasen has great one liners. All his books are fast reads.

I love the HBO series True Blood so it seemed obvious I should start reading the books the series is based on. They are just different enough from the series to keep both interesting. In the past two weeks I've read the first three books: Dead Until Dark, Living Dead in Dallas and Club Dead and last night I almost finished Dead to the World. So far I love them all. (Charlaine Harris)

Room - (Emma Donoghue) Oh man, I loved this book! I read it in two days. I had only heard good things about the book and skipped reading a synopsis or review. The way it was written, I had no idea what was happening until it was revealed. Once the twist of the book was revealed, it seemed even more brilliant. I don't want to say too much and spoil it. You won't regret this one.

The rest of the Sookie Stackhouse series - I'm currently reading book 10, Dead in the Family, I have A Touch of Dead in the wings and book 11 on hold at the library. These are the literary equivalent of eye candy.

What She Wants - (Kathy Kelly) So far, all the books I've read from Kelly I have liked and this one followed the same path.

Backseat Saints - (Joshilyn Jackson) Oh how I love Jackson! I've read all of her books and each one was fantastic. She's one of the few authors I recommend to everyone.

A Discovery of Witches - (Deborah Harkness) Wow. I picked this up because I remember seeing a great review in Entertainment Weekly. It did not disappoint. It's a big book, but it was an easy read. If you like historical fiction, this is for you.

I wrote a little more about these three books here. 

I Know This Much is True - (Wally Lamb) ZZZzzzzz. I put this down. I said in my review I might pick it up again to see how some plot lines evolved, but I never did.

Freedom - (Johnathan Franzen) Another dull, boring book. For something that hefty, it was a complete let down.

Lessons in Heartbreak - (Cathy Kelly) I liked this book, but I didn't like the subject matter. Extramarital affairs are a touchy subject. I think Kelly handled it well, but I was angry with the main character for the whole book. Still, it was a good read.

The Secret of Joy - (Melissa Senate) I really liked this. This is the first book of hers I've read. The main character finds out she has a half sister at the same time she starts a new relationship.

Greetings from Somewhere Else - (Monica McInerney) In the same way Cathy Kelly sets her books in Ireland, all of McInerney's books are set in Australia (I hear my friend Tonya's voice when I'm reading them). I liked this book. I've always wanted a sister, so books about the relationship between female siblings interest me. I've read four others of her books and this was just as good.

Bossypants -  (Tina Fey) If I could only use one word to describe this book it would be hysterical. I'm so glad I chose Bossypants as my first audio book. It's read by Fey herself and she does an excellent job. Had I chosen the print version, this would be the book that would have had me spitting coffee out of my nose in Starbucks. I hope she writes more.