Family Time

Monday, May 5, 2008

Another thing I've really enjoyed about being on holiday is the time we get to spend together doing family type things. I run around like a crazy person and do the cleaning/shopping/grunt work during the week so we can relax together.

Saturday we went downtown to the Red Bull Air Races for the qualifying races. Holy schnikes! Those pilots have cajones of steel. Or maybe platinum. What's a really strong material? Anyway, you get the point. We'd never been before and it was a packed! We had to sit on the water side of the sea wall, which was actually kind of cool, because of the crowds.

Then we took DS to Ocean Beach. OB has a reputation for being the hippy, pot smoking, laid waaaay back surf community of San Diego. And it is. DH and I lived there and LOVED it! (Not for the pot smoking, we don't do that) I moved there back in college and had several roommates until DH moved back from Italy and into my life again (hmm, that may be a topic for another day. let me marinate on it).

At times we really miss it and wish we hadn't done the responsible grown up thing by moving away when I got pregnant. So whenever we happen to be down south we try to stop by some of our old haunts. It was fun to show DS the apartment complex we lived in and the restaurants we went to. I was craving a burger from Hodads (the BEST burger in San Diego! photo from flickr) but since DS doesn't eat burgers we went to our other fave, Nati's, for Mexican.

Oh, it was fried, cheesy, beany heaven! Since I wasn't driving I indulged in a strawberry margie. DH was very diplomatic in saying, "If I remember, they do mix them pretty strong here" when I mentioned feeling a little loopy.

Good food, fast planes, a little play time in the sand. This is what living in California is all about!

Sunday I went to the Carlsbad Street Fair. I'm a sucker for almost all things handmade. DH hates to shop and hates crowds so I got to go alone. I definitely made up for only going walking once last week. I went down every side street.

I bought my Mother's Day presents, a ring and two glass pendants. I'll post photos under my new section What I Find later (still a work in progress, stay tuned). All in all it was a good weekend and a good reminder to not let the jobless thing bog me down and keep me from enjoying the here and now.
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Feelin' Sorry for Myself

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Sunscreen. Check. Towel, sunglasses and hat. Check. Water, snacks, and book. Check, check. I need to take a lot of stuff with me because I'm going to be at The Pity Pool for awhile and it's good to be prepared.

Being on holiday has been really great. I've spent more time with my family, re-connected a little with DH, and am managing the house so much better than I ever have before. Most days I wake up feelin' pretty good.

Today was not one of those days.

I'm coming up on the end of my unemployment and have no real job prospects and I see panic on the horizon. I try to stay in the moment and focus on today. I really do. For instance:

Today I have a roof over my head (bonus points because we own it).

Today there is food in the fridge.

Today I have gas in my car.

Today we are happy and healthy.

I know that should be enough. In my heart I know it, and I believe it. But, every so often I can't help but think about tomorrow:

Tomorrow my car will still need to go to the shop.

Tomorrow I will still need about $8,000 worth of dental work (not a typo).

Tomorrow my CAT will still need about $900 worth of dental work (that's not either).

I have already eaten humble pie and applied to places I never saw myself working and let me tell you that was hard. At this point I need to eat a little more and consider going back to retail.

I can feel you sending me "who does she think she is?!" vibes. Untwist your knickers and let me explain. I'm almost 35 years old. I've been working since I was 15. Having to walk into a place behind Kaylee the Junior who just needs a summer job knowing I'd be the same age as somebody's mom feels pretty sh*#ty. I'm not saying I'm above retail or admin, but I have this been there, done that feeling that I can't shake.

Plus, any job in that industry will want me on weekends. I took corporate, office jobs precisely so I could have my weekends and holidays without having to request them off before anyone else.

AND, if I don't get my ideal schedule, once DS gets out of school, I'll have to pay full-day camp fees so I can work my Noon-6:00 shift. I don't know what minimum wage is these days but I highly doubt it's enough to cover camp and leave me with enough to feel like I'm actually contributing to our financial situation.

AND not having a corporate type gig puts me far behind in the retirement savings and the "extra" healthcare I'd have.

And forget about having another baby! (I know I said I'd talk about this but I'm still not ready yet, sorry).

Does all that make sense? I should be going forward in my career, not looking for another job.

I was so bummed about it I actually composed a letter to all the people who haven't hired me. What's that? You want to read it? Good thing I didn't run it through the shredder yet (Yep, it's handwritten. When I put pen to paper it's serious).

An Open Letter to Hiring Managers

Hello. My name is One La Costa Mom. I'm a 34 year-old wife and mother living in North County. I've been looking for a new job since November 2007 after I was part of a round of layoffs. I realize the current state of our economy has led to a tougher than usual job market, but quite frankly, my continued unemployment is baffling.

I've been working since I was 15. My experience in retail, sales, customer service, admin, media, restaurants and my most recent in Marketing for an award winning company makes me more than qualified to do the job posted on

I'm also fluent in JobSpeak. You are looking for a multitasker. I know that means I'd often have to pick up someone else's slack. And I'm OK with that. You want a team player. I get it. Any ideas I share with you are yours to present to upper management. Fast paced work environment you say? I thrive under unrealistic deadlines.

I am a great candidate. Sure, you can hire the recent grad and offer an even lower salary because of lack of experience, but you get what you pay for. The fact that I'm a mom is my greatest asset. Yes, I will need to leave if my child gets sick. I won't be able to stay late on T Ball days. But, you'll never have to write me up for repeatedly checking my My Space page on company time. My vacations and sick days won't just happen to coincide with every event in the Gaslamp, Spring Break or fight with my boyfriend.

By not hiring me, or any at home mom looking to re-enter the workplace, you're overlooking one of the most highly skilled, competent, talented and creative groups in labor force. Go to almost any popular Mom Blog and you'll see what I mean.

If you will treat me well and help me provide for my family, my loyalty and over-the-top work ethic are yours. Offer me flextime or telecommuting and you'll never have to fill this position again.

One La Costa Mom

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