Losing My Mom of the Year Award

Monday, April 12, 2010

I made Tyler cry yesterday. Granted, I've done it before, but this time it was accidental. Yesterday's weather was below southern California standards. It wasn't nice enough for the pool, beach or park (don't hate) so we decided to go see How To Train Your Dragon.
Tyler was outside playing. I called him in and told him to change into jeans and get his shoes on.

Before I get to the part where I made him cry, let me explain a little bit about Tyler. He makes it virtually impossible to surprise him or treat him to something. Whenever I ask him to get ready so we can leave, he starts in with 20 Questions.

Are we going somewhere?
Where are we going?
Is it the park?
Which park are we going to?
Is it the squishy one* or the one with the sand?
It's not the park?
Is it Chuck e Cheese?
Will there be food there?
Will my cousin be there?
Is it the skate park?
Can I bring my scooter?
Why is the sky blue in the daytime but not at night?

If I don't answer, he just keeps going. I've told him before that sometimes, part of the excitement of going somewhere is the anticipation and element of surprise. He needs to just sit back and enjoy the ride every once in awhile. We're still working on it.

Back to the story.

I can see that he's about to launch into 20 Questions. We need to get moving since we decided to go at the last minute and wanted to catch the next showing (leaving us about 25 minutes to get there) so we could go to dinner afterwards. We didn't have time to play his game.

"We're going to the movies and we need to get a move on."

"What movie are we seeing?"

I get easily frustrated that, when asked to do something, Tyler doesn't always just do it because we're his parents and we asked him to. He has to question everything. I'm sure this is a trait I'll admire later. Now? Not so much. Which is probably what led to me saying:

"You're not seeing a movie, Daddy and I are seeing a grown up one and you're waiting in the car."

Phil laughed a little and said, "we're going to see How To Train Your Dragon and we need to hurry."

Fast forward to after the movie.** We're walking back to the car asking each other what we thought when Tyler says to me, "you know, Mom, you made me cry earlier."

"What do you mean?"

"Before, when I asked where we were going."

"You mean, when I said you were going to be waiting in the car?'

"Yes. I was crying in the back seat on the way here. I used Dad's sweatshirt to wipe my tears."

Yes, he actually said 'wipe my tears.' I felt about thisbig. He didn't hear Phil when he said the name of the movie. My poor kid thought he'd be sitting in the car alone! Obviously, my sarcasm didn't quite come through. I've apologized profusely, but think I'm going to have to pull something really special out of my ass to make up for this one.

Please tell me I'm not the only one to inadvertently reduce their kid to tears?

*We have a park nearby with that bouncy, rubber tire-like stuff under the play structure. We started calling it the squishy park, to differentiate it from the sand park, and the where-we-used-to-live park.
**We all loved the movie. It's really cute. We saw it in IMAX 3D. The dragons aren't super scary, except for the giant bad-guy one. I wouldn't take kids under 5.


  1. I'm sorry..but I had to laugh..just a little. Poor little guy. I'm glad to hear the movie was good. My kids aren't 5 yet, but I wanna see it!

  2. That's a classic parenting moment. We've all been there.

    My kids had different names for all the parks--my favorite was "Jurassic Park." I have no idea why.

  3. Haha! I'm sorry that is hilarious!! You are such a mean mommy! LOL! I've don that before but they didn't have to wipe their tears with Daddy's shirt! ROFL!! I hope he feels better today!

  4. @Dee - It's OK. You can laugh.

    @Jenn - I'll have to work on my delivery.

    @Margaret - When we got in the car, Tyler says, "see, I used this shirt right here." I felt horrible!

  5. Please dont feel bad. I think all Moms have made their children cry at one time or another (and if they say they didn't then I think they're lying). You cant help Mommy guilt-I can completely relate because I have it big time. I feel guilty my son is shy and sensitive (did I make him that way?? was it something I did wrong?? though deep down inside I know thats his own personality but I still can't help it. My younger son has a stuttering problem and I've even blamed myself for that.

    Oh and I use sarcasm with my kids all the time and my younger one now always answers with a sly smile and says "You're kiddiiiinnngg! right?"

  6. @Dee O- My son is sensitive too! I feel the same, "is it because I 'mommy' him too much? do I need to toughen him up somehow?"

    There's A LOT we can second guess ourselves on, but a stutter is definitely not one of them! Please let that go, for your own sanity!


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