Out of the Blue

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

It's been almost a year since I really cried about not having another baby. It happened during BlogHer in New York. I was outside the American Girl store of all places. I went from perfectly fine to crying my eyes out in seconds. The same thing happened while I was watching Parenthood last night. When Julia told Joel she "wasn't done", I nodded along. Yes, I thought, I can relate to that feeling. But when Christina told Adam she was pregnant? I completely lost it.

I knew the decision wouldn't be easy. I even told Phil there were no guarantees I wouldn't hate him every so often though that's irrational and totally not fair since we made the decision together. But I wasn't angry with him last night; just really, really sad. Surprised too, because I thought I've moved on and learned to live with it. I guess I was wrong.

2 comments:

  1. Maybe it's a decision you guys could revisit? People do change their minds....

    ReplyDelete
  2. I feel like everybody in the world is pregnant except me and it makes me bitter. I know that we'll have another, but the time (that we start planning) is not coming fast enough for me. We'd like to have a few things established first so things won't be chaotic and stressful.

    Maybe if hubby sees how upset you are, he'll consider reversing his procedure?

    *HUGS*

    ReplyDelete

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