Friends are relatives you make for yourself - Eustache Deschamps

A few weeks ago I met up with old friends and made a few new ones. San Diego was a stop on Bossy's No Book Tour and Jenn was gracious enough to host us. We used her Magic Vibrator for margaritas and checked the Couch of Doom for corpses from her last party.

As usual when bloggers get together the laptops and iPhones are always close by. Matthew had a great idea that we could celebrate my 10,000th Tweet at the party. If you were on Twitter that night, I apologize for all the inane, useless things I said just to make it to that milestone, only to give you more inane uselessness.

We ate, drank, laughed, Tweeted and played a game of Happy/Crappy all while Cameraman Scott was filming. I hope he got my good side.

I don't know how it happens, but I usually find myself in a conversation about shoes at some point in evenings like this. Curious. My new Michael Kors beauties from Ross got their 5 minutes of fame, which means they've totally paid for themselves.

And there was cake. It deserves a sentence of it's own because it was so good. This was not a 'oh, I'll only have a little sliver' type of cake, this was 'two honking slices please', type of cake. Or maybe that was just me. I'm pretty sure it was just me.

After everyone else left, Deb and I tried to help clean up. Jenn said, no, we said OK, and plopped back onto the Couch of Doom and talked poor Bossy's ear off until she was practically asleep in her chair.

Photo from I Am Bossy's Facebook page

From left: Kelly, Cameraman Scott, Jenn (who doesn't blog but we like her anyway), Christina, Katy, Jenn, Deb, Jacquie, Matthew and Bossy who only had 4 hours of sleep the night before. Her gene pool is brimming with awesome.

It was a good night. I think. Just kidding I remember almost all of it. Thank you again, Jenn, for opening up your home and sharing your drink making sex toy (read the details of the inside joke here.)

*I posted a few more pictures on my Flickr page.

Day at the Beach: My Two Boys Wordless Wednesday

The Crowning Glory of Calla Lily Ponder: Book Review

I'm not sure why I'm fascinated by books set in the post Depression south. I think it's the novelty of the way modern day authors portray the south and southern hospitality. I read The Crowning Glory of Calla Lily Ponder as part of TLC Book Tours. 

I've read all of Rebecca Wells' other books and was excited to see a new title. I wish I could say I loved it; and I'm glad I can say I didn't hate it.  I think the Ya Ya's books were so enjoyable, it was inevitable that I'd compare them despite Calla Lily being a stand alone novel and not part of a series (unless that's coming).

In a nutshell, The Crowning Glory of Calla Lily Ponder is about a young girl, the book's namesake, and her path from childhood to adulthood dealing with different tragedies and triumphs with love and loss thrown in. The book starts out well, lags in the middle and falters a bit at the end. I like many of the themes in the book, like the strength of relationships with family and friends. But, there was a lot of syrup-y overkill too.

What I didn't like:

*The book felt unfinished. Or perhaps as though this version should have been a draft. Parts of it just weren't smooth.

*It felt too long. Parts could have been left out entirely or shortened.

*I'm glad Wells didn't gloss over the state of race relations for the time (I believe it begins in the late 50's or early 60's), but the one section she included, the beating of a young boy, seemed thrown in just so she could say she didn't ignore it.

*The ending, though predictable, happened very abruptly. I could have done with less of some things in the middle of the book and a slightly longer resolution.

*Calla Lily and her family are from La Luna, Louisiana. The Moon Lady and a reverence for the moon is a constant theme throughout the book. It got really tiresome at times.

What I did like:

*The story itself is really sweet. 

*Wells has a way with words. When she's not overwhelming us with the Moon Lady with lines like this:

"The moon, La Luna, is always there. Her pull is strong, strong enough to move the mighty Mississippi, Calla. The Moon Lady, La Luna, is your bridge from darkness to light. Trust in her strength," 

her writing is really lyrical and pretty.

"This was all before I started school and was graced to spend days on end with my mother, so rich and private that even now I can close my eyes and relive them."

I also like the way Wells wrote Calla's mother. Some of the things she says are priceless, " If cleanliness is next to Godliness, then pampering is next to Goddessness." (so true!)

*I'm a sucker for love stories, especially childhood love and reunions. 

*As I said above, I really like stories about the strength of family and lasting friendship bonds, particularly stories about girlfriends who grow up together.

While I wouldn't put this with my top reads or as a book I'd read again, overall I enjoyed it. You can listen to Book Club Girl interview Wells about the book on Blog Talk Radio. 

Have you read The Crowning Glory? What did you think? 

(This is my first book review, did I give too much information? Not enough? Did I ruin the book for you?)

*TLC Tours gave me a copy of the book to review. I'm sure I'll pass it on to my mom. Unless she reads this review. She has less patience for books that don't 'wow' in the first few chapters than I do.The link to the book is my Amazon affiliate.

Happy Mother's Day!

Dear Mom,

You are the best. You take care of me. You feed me, and most importantly you love me. You even give me toilet paper when I need it. I love you a lot. You've always been there for me. Thank you mom!

Love, Tyler

Happy Mother's Day!

Discounted Registration for 2010 3 Day Walks Ends Monday 5-10

Monday is the last day to use code MAY2010 for a $20 discount off registration fees for the 3 Day. The first walk of the year, in Boston, is coming up in July. You can register as an individual, part of a team or find a team to join. Walking really is a life changing experience!

Boston: July 23 - 25

Cleveland: July 30 - Aug 1

Chicago: August 6 - 8

Michigan: August 13 - 15

Twin Cities: August 20 - 22

Denver: August 27 - 29

Seattle: September 24 - 26

San Francisco Bay Area: October 1 - 3

Washington, DC: October 8 - 10

Philadelphia: October 15 - 17

Atlanta: October 22 - 24

Tampa Bay: October 29 - 31

Dallas/Fort Worth: November 5 - 7

Arizona: November 12 - 14

San Diego November 19 - 21 

(If you want to join me and my mom, leave and comment and I'll be in touch!)

Day at the Beach: Surfer Boy - Wordless Wednesday

May 2010

National Mom's Nite Out San San Diego: Update

Hi! Long time no see. Where the heck have I been?! I've been putting together this little party for my San Diego mom friends. It's taken a lot of my time, but it's worth it. I think we've managed to put together another really great party. I still have a few things coming down the pipe, but here's the latest info:

Thursday, May 6th 6:00 - 9:00pm 
Porto Vista Hotel in Little Italy, Ripassi Rooftop Lounge
1835 Columbia Street
San Diego, CA 92101
619-544-0164
www.portovistasd.com (for directions, do not use Mapquest! I got lost)

*Please RSVP if you haven't already. If you can't get to the Facebook page let me know in comments and I'll make a note. 

*Valet parking is available. It's free with a drink purchase. Keep both your valet ticket AND the bar receipt for it to be valid.

Keep me in a safe place!

*We will have hosted appetizers from 6-7:30 including chicken and veggie skewers and sliders. Our drink special is the Strawberry Bahama Mojito for $6. I wanted to call it the Assless Chap but I was outvoted. Happy Hour menu pricing will apply too.

Speaking of assless chaps, meet our server for the evening.  He posed for this photo that's on one of the hotel room walls. Any of you waving single dollar bills or engaging in inappropriate touching may be asked to leave. In other words, he's all mine! (kidding honey, love you)

The view from the roof is amazing! It's breezy too. Despite the heaters, I'd still bring a jacket or wrap. Hell, bring a Snuggie if you want to.

If you need a room for the evening, Porto Vista has offered a $99 rate with code VIRTUEIMC.

We have free 5-minute chair massages from Edwin at Pacific Relxation Massage. You can purchase additional minutes as well.

All you need to bring is money for the raffles, any food/drink you want to buy and tips for the valet and staff. Raffle tickets are the same price as last year: 1 for $5, 3 for $10 and 10 for $20.

A few things on the raffle table: A Dooney and Bourke bag, A Vado pocket cam (similar to a flip), $100 gift card to Seaport Village good for any store with carousel rides and Ben and Jerry's cones too, a one year supply of Dropps laundry detergent, E.L.F makeup and brush set, $50 gift cards to Hanes.com and lots more.

I need to thank Charity and Deb for their help again this year. Also, I enjoyed getting to know and working with Nora from the Porto Vista. Her professionalism is greatly appreciated. Thank you, ladies!

I love my sponsors, they've been great! I'm so happy to be working with many again and grateful for the ones new to this year. Your contributions and donations are what is making this such a fantastic event! (in no particular order)

Porto Vista Hotel

Seaport Village

Wilton

Dropps Laundry

Carolina Pad

The Tote Buddy

Froots

See Here.com

Hanes.com

Bumbleride

Sweet Funky Vintage

Big Honcho Media

Ketchum

Eyes, Lips, Face

The Vintage Pearl

Give Daddy.com

Skoy Cloths

Handstand Kids

Dove Chocolates

Studio 19

Boogie Wipes

Me and Goji

VPG Printing

Evolve Salon and Day Spa

Pacific Relaxation Massage

Theresa Rose jewelry

Build A Bear

Hasbro

Family Adventure Guidebooks

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

*Charity, Deb and I contacted sponsors directly or were referred by the National Mom's Nite Out creator, BSM Media. We have not been paid to promote any business. All sponsors donated their products/materials for use as a door prize, gift bag or raffle item.

Ready, Set, Walk!

I can't believe how fast the year is going! Last year when I was getting ready for the 3 day, I felt like I had all the time in the world to prepare. I was so wrong. November will be here before I know it. I'm heading out for my first walk of the year. I've set my goal today for four miles. My ankle isn't 100% but I went to see my foot guy again and now I have supports in my shoes. I can't train in the pair I have for too much longer since they (literally) have a lot of miles on them. New ones are definitely in order. 

I don't want to make the same mistakes I did last year; namely not training enough and not training on the same streets as the walk route (ie lots of hills and curbs, I may have to do a whole post on curbs!). I also didn't train with my fanny pack last year (BTW I hate the term fanny pack. Is there something better? Butt bag? I think I'll use that).

I used a small backpack last year and hardly carried anything in it. As a result, I wasn't prepared for the weight of all the stuff I lugged around during the walk. Having all of that weight on my lower back definitely changed my stride so this year I'm wearing my butt bag from the start. Mine is from Eddie Bauer and I love it because it holds A LOT. It has adjustable rubber bands on the sides to hold the water bottles in place. That doesn't seem important until the third time you bend over to tie your shoes and they fall out, rolling in everyone's way. Not that I'd know about that from experience. Ahem. This is what I'll be taking with me on training walks:

Two water bottles

Snacks (as the walk gets closer I carry a lot more food)

Sunscreen

Lip balm with sunscreen

Wet wipes

Hand sanitizer
Camera (I'll start carrying the video camera too)

Hair ties

Cell phone

iPod

Nike Plus pedometer (for the iPod)

Business card case with debit card, ID and a little cash

Not pictured: toilet seat covers (for emergency porta potty stops)

Hat (either my wide brimmed straw or a ball cap)

I carry a lot more during the actual walk. My suggestion to first time walkers is to decide early on whether you want to use a backpack or butt bag and carry it from the get go.

I'm excited to be an online ambassador again this year. I'm happy to help newbie walkers any way I can. If you're in San Diego and want to train with me, let me know! There are other ambassadors all across the country.* We'll all be posting our progress and tips. We're here to help, support and encourage. If you have questions, please ask!

*Links to @the3day's profile on Twitter with all the other ambassadors.

Earth Day 2010: International Housewares Show Finds

"The Earth is what we all have in common" - Wendell Berry

I've got a long way to go towards living a truly green lifestyle. I may not ever get there since there are things I can't see myself giving up (public transportation in my area stinks), and some things I can't see doing (composting) but I'm being more aware. I read labels more than I have before. I combine errands. I've added a few organics to our diet. I'm sure my next car will be even more fuel efficient than my current one. Baby steps, but steps nonetheless. 

I saw several things at the International Housewares Show that have stuck with me because I know they would be easy for me to work into my family and our lifestyle.

The Green Garmento

I like this because I dryclean a lot of my dresses, shirts and my nice jeans. We also take Phil's uniforms in once a month for reserves. I try to remember to take the hangers and plastic bags back but more often than not they end up in the trash. I think it's great that their site offers carbon offsetting from the shipping of their products.

Nellie's All Natural

They had the cutest booth. I think that's what really caught my attention. That and the woman doing the demos in a bathrobe and slippers. Sign me up for that job, please! I've seen Nellie's products at my Crate and Barrel outlet. The dryer ball interested me the most. I've heard they do a good job in speeding up drying time.

Sometimes I have to run the dryer twice and I don't know if it's better to divide one washed load into two smaller ones and dry them; or run the dryer once, take out the items that dry the fastest and then finish the cycle. I'm not sure I'd switch to their laundry powder because of the eczema in our house and the limited availability, but I'd be curious to know if it's more cost effective than liquid laundry soap. Have you used Nellie's?

Simple Green Naturals

I already use Simple Green, especially after we make bacon or use the George Foreman. It's awesome for breaking down all that fat. I think the Naturals are a good addition to the product line. They smelled good, which is key for me (I tried Simple Green Green Apple. Bad. Really bad.). One change I hope they make is to offer those little concentrated refill canisters across all their product lines so we don't have to buy the big plastic bottle each time.

Spaghetti Scrubs

Pic from the site, I forgot to take one at the show

I'd also glanced at these in Crate and Barrel before the trip to Chicago. I'm a bit skeptical about their effectiveness. Most of their line is made with peach pits, walnut shells, pumice stone and corn cobs. They're designed to replace cleaning agents but can be used with a small amount of product. I see myself using one for my cast iron pan since they're not supposed to be washed, only rinsed with hot water, but sometimes stuff gets stuck and I end up scrubbing. If the Spaghetti Scrub won't ruin my cookware I'd give them a try. Sponges are definitely on my 'things I feel guilty while using them' list.

Copco To Go Cups

I'd seen the hot drink cups at Bed, Bath and Beyond before the show. I was going to buy one of hot cups but the people at the booth were giving them out. Yay! I've used it almost every day since I got back. It holds a Grande at Starbucks or the 20 ounce from 7-11 (my new recessionista obsession). It's dishwasher safe but ours is broken so I can't vouch for how it holds up in there. I have re-heated coffee in the microwave though. Once I get the cold cup (above) for smoothies I'll be all set. Copco is a division of Wilton, the bakeware company. I didn't know that before the show.

These last two aren't from Housewares, the companies are local to me.

Skoy Cloths

Samples for Mom's Nite Out swag bags

Also on my guilt list are paper towels. I make a conscious decision to buy recycled but if I don't have a coupon I buy whatever is priced best. I really like these because they come from a local, mom owned company. Michelle and Karen live just a few minutes from me! These cloths are biodegradable and can be sanitized in the dishwasher or microwave. I didn't see these at the Housewares Show. I got a cloth in the swag bag at women's expo I went to last weekend. I wrote to them, asked if they'd be willing to donate to my Mom's Nite Out party and they said yes!

The Tote Buddy

Pic from the site

Another local business and Mom's Nite Out supporter. I met Julie at another women's networking event. I was looking for her business card to ask about Mom's Nite Out and then I got an email from her. It was meant to be! If the back of your car looks like mine, this is will definitely help. The Tote Buddy holds up to 10 reusable bags. It helps with 'forgetting them in the car' and fits well under the shopping cart. Julie has offered code 'earthday' until 4/30 for a $2 discount.

In some ways I think we, as a society, will never completely be able to undo the damage we've done to the planet. Cell phones, computers and cars are here to stay. I do think there's a lot more we could and should be doing to protect the ocean and other precious habitats. I don't think global warming is a made-up phenomenon.

Watching shows like Discovery's Planet Earth and Life have started great discussions in our house. I may not be able to make big changes but I can make the effort and pass those habits on to Tyler. I guess that's the best way we can all start healing the planet, by educating our kids and having them learn from our mistakes.

What changes have you made since last Earth Day? Do you think the 'green movement' is overblown?

*This is not a sponsored post. None of these companies asked me to post about them and I didn't tell them I was going to. Other than the product donations for Mom's Nite Out, I'm not benefiting from posting. These are things I'm genuinely interested in and feel comfortable supporting, especially the mom owned businesses.

Wordless Wednesday: It's NOT What It Looks Like

Admit It, You've Done It Too

It's Monday. You have a party to go over the weekend at your new blog friend's house. You need a pedicure but think, I've really got to get caught up on laundry, I'll go tomorrow. The next day it's grocery shopping and so on and so forth until finally it's Saturday afternoon. 

Of course your outfit, down to the peep toe shoes, is already planned. So, what to do? You have two choices. Either change your outfit at the last minute possibly resulting in a clothing crisis, or, you can get creative:

I had the flower painted on at the Head to Toe Women's Expo

I went with the latter.

Kid Fest San Diego Seeking A Mom Owned Business

One of the things I like most about blogging and our community is the opportunity to give back once in awhile. If you know a mom who is just starting or has recently launched a business and could use a little promotion, go to the Kid Fest San Diego page on Facebook and nominate her (or yourself!) for booth space at the event! 

I Gave My Kid an Eyeful Yesterday

I was early enough at afternoon pick up to get a good parking spot and to stand by the gates and catch Tyler on his way out. We walked back to the car and he was his usual chatty self. We always talk the whole ride home about how his day was, what he did at recess, whether his larva died. The usual kid stuff.

We hopped in the car and he got really quiet. Actually, he didn't say a word. I pulled up to a red light and looked over my shoulder to ask if everything was okay. Tyler was leaning forward in his booster seat, staring at the floor behind the driver's seat.

What on earth is he staring a...

*mental head slap*

Crappity, crap, crap. 

They don't take those magazines at Goodwill. I forgot I'd tossed them on the floor. At least it was this issue was on top of the pile and not one of the other two.

I told Phil the story as we were getting ready for bed. His reaction? 

"Heh heh. That's my boy. Heh heh. Bewbs." [in a Beevis and Butthead voice, naturally]

 Mom. Fail.

Wordless Wednesday: Blue Italian Ice

Oceanside Farmer's Market April 2010

What Do You Know About It?!

We've been watching Life on Discovery*. It's been great family time. It has, however, opened a door we weren't prepared to go through. The show talks a lot about mating. A lot. Two weeks ago, we were all cozied up on the couch watching the episode about birds when Oprah (she narrates) said the word seks and Tyler screwed up his face.

"Ewww!"

Me: "What's ewww?"

"She said, 'ES-E-X'." [how does he know how to spell it?!]

"What do you know about seks?" 

"It's gross."

"Why is it gross?"

Phil is looking at me over Tyler's head and his eyes kept getting bigger and more deer in headlights-y.

Kinda like this female Dawson's Burrowing Bee.

"Because there's all that kissing. That's gross."

"Actually, kissing is kissing. Seks is how babies are made."

Phil had a heart attack. 

Tyler didn't say anything to that. After the show, we sent him to get ready for bed.

Phil: "Why did you tell him that?!"

"I didn't want him on the playground yelling at some girl, 'stop trying to have seks with me!' He needs to know the difference."

"I'm not ready for this, he's only 7!" 

"Me neither, but kids are doing some scary stuff, we're going to have to talk about it eventually."

"Yes, but he's only 7!!"

We told my mom the story when she was here last week. She, of course, thought it was hysterical. My parents didn't have The Talk with me. I'm sure with my brother it was, "do not, under any circumstances, bring home a pregnant girlfriend." 

I've been wondering when the topics of seks would come up. I figured we'd wait until Tyler brought it up and answer age appropriately. When he was a toddler, we told him the proper names for body parts and that he used to drink milk from my breasts. I think we've done a good job giving him the information he needs and answering his questions honestly. 

Now that he's brought it up, I guess it's time to think more in depth about how we'll answer the actual how-to questions. I'm sure it will be up to me, given Phil's reaction to this little incident. 

How old were your kids when you had The Talk? What did you say?

*Life is such a good show. Very similar to the Planet Earth series. I wasn't asked to write about it, we just really enjoy it and have had fun watching together. Photo from the Life/Discovery website.

Losing My Mom of the Year Award

I made Tyler cry yesterday. Granted, I've done it before, but this time it was accidental. Yesterday's weather was below southern California standards. It wasn't nice enough for the pool, beach or park (don't hate) so we decided to go see How To Train Your Dragon.
Tyler was outside playing. I called him in and told him to change into jeans and get his shoes on.

Before I get to the part where I made him cry, let me explain a little bit about Tyler. He makes it virtually impossible to surprise him or treat him to something. Whenever I ask him to get ready so we can leave, he starts in with 20 Questions.

Are we going somewhere?
Where are we going?
Is it the park?
Which park are we going to?
Is it the squishy one* or the one with the sand?
It's not the park?
Is it Chuck e Cheese?
Will there be food there?
Will my cousin be there?
Is it the skate park?
Can I bring my scooter?
Why is the sky blue in the daytime but not at night?

If I don't answer, he just keeps going. I've told him before that sometimes, part of the excitement of going somewhere is the anticipation and element of surprise. He needs to just sit back and enjoy the ride every once in awhile. We're still working on it.

Back to the story.

I can see that he's about to launch into 20 Questions. We need to get moving since we decided to go at the last minute and wanted to catch the next showing (leaving us about 25 minutes to get there) so we could go to dinner afterwards. We didn't have time to play his game.

"We're going to the movies and we need to get a move on."

"What movie are we seeing?"

I get easily frustrated that, when asked to do something, Tyler doesn't always just do it because we're his parents and we asked him to. He has to question everything. I'm sure this is a trait I'll admire later. Now? Not so much. Which is probably what led to me saying:

"You're not seeing a movie, Daddy and I are seeing a grown up one and you're waiting in the car."

Phil laughed a little and said, "we're going to see How To Train Your Dragon and we need to hurry."

Fast forward to after the movie.** We're walking back to the car asking each other what we thought when Tyler says to me, "you know, Mom, you made me cry earlier."

"What do you mean?"

"Before, when I asked where we were going."

"You mean, when I said you were going to be waiting in the car?'

"Yes. I was crying in the back seat on the way here. I used Dad's sweatshirt to wipe my tears."

Yes, he actually said 'wipe my tears.' I felt about thisbig. He didn't hear Phil when he said the name of the movie. My poor kid thought he'd be sitting in the car alone! Obviously, my sarcasm didn't quite come through. I've apologized profusely, but think I'm going to have to pull something really special out of my ass to make up for this one.

Please tell me I'm not the only one to inadvertently reduce their kid to tears?

*We have a park nearby with that bouncy, rubber tire-like stuff under the play structure. We started calling it the squishy park, to differentiate it from the sand park, and the where-we-used-to-live park.
**We all loved the movie. It's really cute. We saw it in IMAX 3D. The dragons aren't super scary, except for the giant bad-guy one. I wouldn't take kids under 5.

Support Afterschool Programs in Your Area {sponsored}

When I was four, my mom worked and I went to daycare.  From the stories my parents tell, I hated it. I would cry every day at drop off. It got so bad that, anytime we got into the car and headed in that direction, I would "scream bloody murder," (direct quite from my mom) and my parents would have to spend a long time calming me down. After awhile, my parents decided it wasn't worth it, putting us all through that, and they decided my mom would stay home.

 

For us, we've been very fortunate in having access to good care for Tyler. We put him in kindergarten literally at the last minute and were lucky our school had spots open so close to the start of the school year. One of the reasons we like our district is the on-site, affordable child care. When I was working, having before and after care right on the school grounds gave us so much peace of mind. Tyler loved Miss Rosie and Miss Molly! They helped the kids with their homework, gave them a snack and offered a good balance between play time and crafts.

But, I had working mom guilt that we weren't able to enroll Tyler into any type of sports or have after school playdates because of our schedules. Now that I'm home, I'm trying to make up for lost time. The few hours we have together after school before the homework and dinner chaos have become really special. We're taking full advantage of So Cal living and we go to the beach, the park, the farmer's market, on bike rides, play tennis, hang out at the pool, to the local skate park or occasionally for Fro Yo or ice cream. Tyler loves his martial arts class and now he wants to start competing in tournaments (hold me!)

Just like my mom, I know I'm blessed to have the option to stay at home. I also know that my situation could change, I'll have to go back to work and we'll need to utilize the on-site care at school again. Finding affordable, quality childcare shouldn't be a luxury or dependent on the neighborhood you live in, but that's the case for lots of working families. 15 million children take care of themselves after school. I see kids Tyler's age walking home after school and it makes me sad thinking they might be alone for hours until their families get home.

Afterschool programs can help keep kids off the streets. My brother didn't go to a formal program. He wasn't a trouble maker, per se, but occasionally things seemed to "just happen" to he and his friends. The hours right after school are when kids are most likely to experiment or get in trouble. My brother got involved in soccer and I firmly believe it kept him on the right path.

The Afterschool Alliance  and its partners are working to keep affordable programs available for all families. Quaker Chewy, a new partner, created a contest to help spread the word about Afterschool Alliance. If you have an iCarly fan at home, enter the Afterschool Rocks Sweeptsakes and Miranda Cosgrove could play a concert for your kids' school and a meet and greet with Miranda.

If you want to get involved in afterschool programs as a volunteer or find a program in your area the Afterschool Alliance has links on their site. They're also on Twitter and Facebook. You have until April 16th to get your daily entries into the sweepstakes.

What are your favorite after school memories?

*This is a sponsored post from Quaker Chewy Afterschool Rocks. I was compensated to write this post but the thoughts and memories I'm making with my son are completely my own.

Wordless Wednesday: Feathered Sky

Three Years in the Making

When we were looking for a house, I had a few non-negotiable's. I really wanted three bedrooms, two stories and a fireplace. Everything else was gravy. Luckily, the house gods were smiling on us and out of three of our accepted offers, the house we ended up buying met all my criteria. 

But.

We bought a fixer. We wanted the school district so we sacrificed move-in ready for location and a school within walking distance (not that we do walk, but we could). One of the many "issues" our house had was a non-working fireplace. The seller refused to fix it. The repair kept falling to the bottom of our to-do list. 

During the brief California winters, we've been looking longingly at the broken fireplace, wishing we could warm the house with blazing logs rather than turn on the heater, listen to the crackling and sit next to it sipping hot cocoa together. 

After three years, we finally got our wish and it's just as nice as we thought it would be.

And Then He Could Fly

It's hard watching Tyler struggle with self confidence and being brave. On the one hand, he's recently asked me to help him become famous. On the other, he gets stage fright sometimes. He loves roller coasters but doesn't want to try the "big kid" ramp at the skate park. 

We try to be encouraging without patting him on the back for every little thing he does. The "everybody gets a star" mentality has ruined kids' abilities to take constructive criticism and have pride in their own accomplishments. But, it's hard not to give in occasionally when I see Tyler falter. 

I babysat last week and had 4 kids at the house. It didn't rain after all (thank you Jesus!) so I made them go outside. The kids had scooters and I moved my car so they could roll down the driveway. The other little boy, "Joe," is younger than Tyler, shorter and seems to be naturally athletic. He's been taking skateboard lessons locally and can do tricks Tyler hasn't learned yet. "Joe" suggested they use the driveway as a ramp and then jump off the curb. He went down over and over, catching pretty good air and landing without ending up on the ground. 

Tyler started to go several times but backed out at the last minute saying he was going too fast. "Joe" was trying to be encouraging, showing Tyler how to do it and where to jump. Tyler took it as criticism and I could see the beginnings of a sulk. I debated with myself as to whether I should step in and be encouraging or if I'd make it worse. Tyler went inside and I followed. He saw me and then came the beginnings of tears. 

"Talk to me, what's wrong?"

"He's making fun of me because I can't do the jump."

"No, he's trying to be helpful, I think you're just taking it the wrong way."

I reminded him that "Joe" started skateboarding before Tyler and that he's a full head taller than "Joe", which means he's heavier and has a different center of gravity.

"You may not be able to do it his way, but you can figure out your own way."

That seemed to help and Tyler went back outside. They abandoned the driveway for awhile and raced up and down the street instead. We had lunch and I sent them back out (we'd already had one nearly broken picture frame, a Darth Vader helmet to the nose and wood floors vs. sock feet; they were too amped to be inside!).

I had a feeling Tyler would want to try the jump again. And I was right. It took him a few tries, but he did it. And then it was like he'd known how to do it all along.

"Did you see that mom?! I totally nailed it! This is SO much fun!"

I guess my pep talk worked after all. Perhaps a little too well?

Look What Texas Holly Made Me Do!

"If I don't stop shopping, I'll end up a bag lady: a Fendi bag lady, but a bag lady..." - Carrie, Sex and the City

When I was in Chicago for the Housewares show, I finally got to meet Holly of June Cleaver Nirvana. She had the cutest yellow handbag that we oohed and aahed over.

Being the obsessive person that I am, I couldn't stop thinking about it. I had to have a yellow bag too. Yellow is supposedly one of the colors for spring, along with turquoise. I love jewel tones. I am weak. The result:

Isn't it fab! I love it. I found it at TJ Maxx and used a gift card I've been hanging on to. It was the inside that sold me.

And, since two is better than one, I bought this at Target:

I'm ready for spring (and summer!) What about you? Who's twisted your arm lately and what did you buy?

Wordless Wednesday: International Housewares Show in Purple

I have more purple pictures on Flickr. 

*Attending the Housewares show was a sponsored trip. Hoover provided airfare, travel, accommodations and a meal. I wasn't asked to photograph any brand. An brand name in shots is coincidental. Thank you Hoover and Current for the opportunity!

I Hope She Can Take A Joke

Yesterday, Tyler and I went to the card store for his great-grandmother's birthdays. I let him choose the ones he wanted to give. 

Inside reads: "It's too late for that!"

Let's hope Gramma has her sense of humor on when she opens it!

National Mom's Nite Out San Diego: Save the Date

I can't believe it's time to plan the Mom's Nite Out party again! Last year's event was a lot of fun. I'm hoping to find another great location as well as bring in some great sponsors for the swag bags and door prizes. I have a Mom's Nite page on Facebook that I'll keep current with information. I'm actively looking for sponsors. If you've worked with a great company or brand you think would be a good fit, please let me know.

Thursday, May 6th, 2010

Location TBA

Time: Should be 6:00-9:00pm

If you're in San Diego, I hope you can make it!

Conflicted: When Business and Home Collide

My little man has inherited his mother's Gift of Gab. The kid starts talking as soon as his feet hit the floor in the morning. Unfortunately, Chatty Patty is getting in a little bit of trouble at school. We've talked with him about it. Hopefully it's sinking in that disrupting the class is not OK. 

Tonight is Open House at school. I also have an event I agreed to before the date for the open house was set. I feel that I need to go to school to set up a meeting with Tyler's teachers. He's also really looking forward to showing us his PowerPoint presentation (is anyone else's kid doing PowerPoint in second grade?!). 

I want his teacher to know that we're involved parents. I also want Tyler to know we're proud of him. But, this event is a good networking opportunity. It's hosted by a really good local ad agency and there are several people working there I'd like to meet. 

I don't know why, but now that I'm home, it feels harder to juggle all my roles. I decided to stay home to be more available to my family and to make our lives less chaotic. But, the more involved I get in social media, the more opportunities I have and I'm spending more time trying to (hopefully) create a business.

I feel stuck in the middle. Should I be a good mom and go to Open House or think of my professional goals and go to the event?

What would you do?

Neediness and Accolades

I've said before that external validation matters to me. I know it shouldn't, but it does. It's a hurdle I face almost daily. It's not necessarily what other people think of me, or whether they like me, but more about whether I'm noticed. That sounds incredibly egotistical but I don't mean it to be. When I say noticed, I guess I actually mean "do I matter."

Does it matter to anyone that I did two loads of laundry today? Does it matter that I got caught up on my emails? Has anyone noticed the bathroom sinks are clean? That I made the bed? I went to the store for orange juice, milk and bread so we wouldn't run out. Etc. etc. etc. 

It's needy and insecure. I know that. I wasn't this bad before I became a SAHM (at least I don't think so). When I was working, I could expect feedback from my co-workers and bosses. Good or bad, at the end of the day, I knew where I stood. 

Now that I'm home, I still need that feedback. When I get a, "the house looks great," or "hey, key lime yogurt, thanks mom!" I know that what I've done and the time I've taken to do it, has been noticed. The same goes for this blog. For the most part, I'm OK with the traffic and lack of comments. I have to earn those. 

But it's so nice to be recognized by your peers, and even better when those peers are some of the best in their fields. I put a lot of effort into this site. I think about it more than I should. It's so nice to have someone say that what I do here matters.

I want to thank the people from InflunceSD for the recognition. It means a lot to me and I can say with all honesty it's an honor just to be nominated. I'm in excellent company too, which makes it even sweeter.

Thank you!

My First Library Card: A Proud Mama Moment

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. ~Groucho Marx

I love to read and so does Phil. Before we got pregnant we talked about wanting our future kids to love it as well. Tyler has had his own library since he was an infant. We still have some of my Dr. Seuss books on his bookshelf. When I was younger, my mom would take me to the book store for the latest Sweet Valley High book and I'd finish it by the end of the day. She'd jokingly-but-kinda-not tell me to slow. it. down. At the time, I couldn't figure out why she'd want me not to read. But now that Tyler is flying through chapter books, I totally get it. Our reading addiction isn't cheap!

So, I took Tyler to the library and he got his own library card. Of course I was a proud mama but more so because HE was proud to have his own card and thinks it's a big responsibility. He keeps his card in his wallet. He reminds me when his books are due.

It's been great introducing him to some of the same books I read when I was his age. We go to the used library book store since kids books are usually .25 or .50. It's a habit I'm happy to indulge, although it's strange having to tell him, "alright, enough reading, turn off the light and go to bed already!"

What are you doing to encourage reading at your house? 

 

*Sorry for the crap cell phone photos

Wordless Wednesday: Crazy Hair Day

Disney World: Tips for First Time Visits part 2

*This is the second part of our post on tips for people planning their first trip to Walt Disney World. Read the first part here.

5) Use the Disney Mom Panel advice. Research the different hotels in your price range. The Port Orleans Riverside is not the same as the Port Orleans French Quarter. Take into account location and transportation hubs. The Polynesian, Grand Floridian, and Contemporary sit in prime locations, with water taxis, monorail, and bus service. You can walk from the Contemporary to one park. Animal Kingdom Lodge on the other hand has only bus service. Not necessarily a deal breaker, but something to consider when planning your days. Some resorts offer convenience and modern amenities while others focus on charm and immersion in themes.

6) Use the Key to the World. Having your room key as a charge card, fast pass, and park ticket all in one is tremendous. This conceivably allows you to leave everything else in the wall safe and just carry that and your I.D. We had a bunch of American Express and Visa gift cards [to use for out of pocket expenses], but keeping track of the different cards and their balances was a pain. Using the room key to cover all charges and then using the different gift cards to pay the final balance at the end was a great help. To illustrate how awesome the dining plan is again, the final bill for a 7 day stay was about $170. This was mostly from gratuities on the sit down meals, with a few souvenirs and adult beverages thrown in. The dining plan virtually guarantees you won't be buying [a lot of] food out of pocket.

Anyone else remember the commercial jingle?

We cashed in our credit card reward points for a pre-paid Visa and combined it with Christmas presents, some pre-paid Visas I won and one with a leftover balance from Tastemakers and took all them with us for our out of pocket expenses. Combined with the Disney gift cards we got from the Vacation Club presentation and we had about $700 to use (and came home with almost all of it). 

It took a few days for Phil to think of this, but we started charging everything to our room. Hot chocolate, the tips on our sit down meals, the hats and scarves we bought because it freezing. It was nice not to have to keep track of cash or the balances on the various cards. The key is this (and it's important!): you MUST settle those charges the night BEFORE you are to check out or they will automatically go onto the card you used to reserve the trip! 

We stopped into the hotel lobby on the way back from a late dinner and took care of it. The most money we spent out of pocket was in the airports on breakfasts and Starbucks. If you have any means of earning pre-paid cards, answering emails or taking surveys and buying cards with that money I highly suggest it.

7) Plan your trip carefully on the website. The website is very helpful, but there are some snags with it. Two [things] that bothered me the most were the itinerary function, and the initial booking function. You have to be very careful when booking your trip because there are several defaults in the system. 

When you pick your initial date, number of people, and hotel range, it will kick out a recommended package. This is when you can go in and change options around such as dining plan, room choice, and ticket options. Be careful, because when you select an option for one thing, it may effect other categories you didn't intend. 

For instance, the default ticket option gives you the park hopper and water park. If you select a dining plan, it resets that option to the base ticket, which is what comes with the dining plan. The itinerary function is just buggy. I had a hard time making and editing notes. I wanted to keep dining reservations there, but it was difficult, and didn't always display right. Also, the printout isn't as functional as it could be.

Hollywood Studios stunt show

8) Make dinner reservations. Early. If you don't have reservations when you start your trip, you aren't getting in to any restaurant during peak hours. Period. If you find yourself without reservations, your best bet is to hit the place right when it opens for lunch or dinner. If you try at noon or 6 without reservations you can forget it. The resort restaurants are less crowded then the park ones, so you may have better luck there.

This is definitely necessary but leaves little room for flexibility because reservations need to made at least 180 days before your trip! Say you're in Magic Kingdom waiting in a 90-minute line for Space Mountain. You have 6:00 reservations for dinner at Animal Kingdom. You have to be very aware of your time, factor in travel times around the park and be prepared to give up your fast passes.

If you're late, your reservation is gone. If you make a reservation plan on being in that park for the day. There were a few times we didn't want to leave where we were. We also had some rain that we didn't feel like venturing out into but didn't want to lose the chance to eat at the various place in the park (there's some awesome food at Disney!)

Phil originally had eight tips but I wanted to add one item.

9) Check, re-check and check the weather again. We had a freak cold because of the snow the east got. We were under dressed and not prepared. I was at the conference on the day it poured and Phil wasn't sure where to go to spend a rainy day. We didn't know there was a movie theater in Downtown Disney and we hadn't gone to Epcot yet and didn't know about Innoventions either. It's easy to kill about 2 hours there. The couches for tired parents are a welcome bonus. Have a back up plan for weather.

What Do You Dream Of? {a guest post}

Greetings from Chicago! I'm on a quick trip to the International Housewares show. Please welcome guest poster Breanne from Bella Vita. She's a new mom, new to blogging, a Lost fan and was a contestant on Jeopardy. Her daughter is as cute as a bug!

Nothing Happens Unless First We Dream- Carl Sandberg

Hi, Mel A Dramatic Mommy readers! Thanks so much to Melanie for the chance to guest blog for her! My name’s Breanne, and my blog is Bella Vita—“beautiful life” in Italian. I am an optimistic person who believes life is inherently beautiful, and I’m also the proud momma of a little girl named Bella. 

As a woman still trying to adjust to life as mom, I’ve been thinking a lot about goals, ambitions, and dreams over these first seven months of my daughter’s life. Of course, I’ve thought a lot about my dreams for my baby girl. For her to be smart, funny, loving, generous, healthy, and most of all, happy. 

Will she want to be a scientist? An actress? A writer, like her mommy? Or maybe she’ll want to be something brand-new, that hasn’t even been created yet. Had my mom heard the word “blogger” when I was born in the eighties? Nope.

In the midst of all these thoughts about my dreams for Bella, I thought a lot about my dreams for myself as well. I can’t lie: the first few weeks were so overwhelming to me because of my baby’s sleep issues that it honestly felt like I would never be able to write again.

But of course, that wasn’t true. She adjusted to the big, new world, and my husband and I adjusted to her. So after a few weeks—okay, months—I was once again able to devote a little time to other goals and aspirations I have for my life: the things that I wish for myself. 

Over these past few months, as I’ve really thought about what I want to do, what I want to be, I've come to realize that many people actually have at least two major ideas about what they want to be, two types of goals for their lives. The first is the more “realistic” one, the one that has some foundation in what you went to school for, or the career path you’re already on. But the second is the wild and out-there dream, the one you may keep to yourself if you’re not brave enough to share it, the one you might be afraid people would laugh at. 

So many people I know and love have both types of dreams. My friend Sarah is currently in med school and wants to be a family practice doctor; if she could, she would also love to be a Christian missionary to Africa. Another friend, Kristi, majored in biology and wants to work at a zoo or aquarium. However, I suspect that she just might be happiest if she were in her other dream job: a waitress on a beach—preferably in Aruba. My husband has the dual dreams, too. He’s in public works in the small Midwestern town we live in, and someday, he’d like to achieve more of a management role in his field. But he’s said to me before that sometimes he wishes he’d gone to culinary school. He’s a fantastic cook, and I know he’d love working as a chef. 

So what are mine? Well, I work hard on growing my blog and making it meaningful; I also work on my fiction, with several short stories and a novel in progress, so ultimately, I want to be a published writer. My crazy dream? I want to own my own bakery. The awesome, work-of-art cake type of bakery. Wedding cakes, celebration cakes, sculpted cakes. I’d make them all, and they’d all be beautiful. 

In reality, I’ve just started exploring this as a new hobby, but in my dream, I have my own successful bakery business, and when my daughter is older, she’ll come visit me after school and help me make the cakes. I have such a clear picture of this in my head, and in a strange way, it means as much to me as the pictures in my head of my successful writing career. 

What about all of you? What are your more grounded dreams, and what are your wildest dreams? I'd love to hear them.